Saturday, January 7, 2012

1 year old check up

J is now in the 75th percentile for height. I was afraid it was all in my head that she had grown so much. I've been having a existential crisis about how I ended up with a 1 year old. (This episode may be due to substituting at my Alma Mater for a friend I went to high school with, compounded with the laundry situation leading me to wear my favorite concert shirts form high school. I swear I'm not REALLY and adult yet). The doc didn't bother telling me her percentile for weight, but showed me that she was right on for her own growth curve. I think he knows I stress about it too much and become a little neurotic about numbers. Little girl is just going to be tall and thin. I suppose there are worse things to be.

Then my doc gave what he calls the "1 year old mommy pep talk," outlining how my kid will stop snuggling and wanting me. I told him she never did so that wasn't an issue. Then he gave some great discipline advice. "She is going to start having temper tantrums (I said she already has) and they will last for...oh...about... the next 18 years." The banging the head on the floor and screaming will stop but then will turn into viscous words and she'll say how much she hates you and never wants to see you again. Then you'll get a call when she's 18 and away at school on what a wonderful mother you are and how she always thought that. Essentially, it's really easy to get depressed, but don't give up. Keep disciplining her so at the 1 millionth time she might stop and think first.

And tossed in there was the best line of the whole appointment:

"So when you are teaching her not to play in the toilet, you are really teaching her not to have sex before she's married."



Nikki said...

Wow! Sounds like a really strange appointment :)

Bree Flake said...

oh my gosh i love your doc! haha so funny!

Jackijo said...

That last line is the perfect title for your book on child raising.

birdfam said...

That is the funniest thing I have ever heard! Thanks for the laugh:) And there is nothing wrong with being tall & skinny - unless you send her to school with "flood" pants on.


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